Mateos Confession
I was going through old e-mail messages, and decided to read an e-mail i received by accident from my recent ex. It was sent to me by accident, but these things are never by accident you know. Kinda like a freudian slip or whatever. When you do something subconciously, that wasn’t part of the plan consciously.
Anyway, i never deleted that e-mail like he asked me to. Instead i read it and saved it. I don’t know why, but i am a hoarder by nature so…But that e-mail really tore me up inside. It made me question the relationships men and women have. Whether they are truly worth it. Worth all the pain and joy another human being can bring or inflict upon you. We are such complicated creatures, difficult to understand and yet so brave too.
Oh but the pain we cause each other. At what point do you forget that you once truly loved this person, that you now wish you’d never set eyes on. And what point do you forget all those nights you talked about your dreams, your future? Maybe you don’t forget, hey we see that clearly everytime we throw a lovers confession back in their faces. A confession made when they felt safe with you, safe in your love.
But we forgive and we forget. Maybe all just hopeless romantics. Quick to forget the wounds caused by recent lovers, or the scars left by old ones. So what is it that makes up venture out there again and again? I don’t know, but I am scared. Scared of the ineveitable cycle, the ups and the lows. Oh the low’s…
